Braves, gone fishing lately?

I knew you guys wouldn't disappoint!!! Braves, you're the best!

 

For Your Amusement-



Men strike back!
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
Them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men pass gas more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
Build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door , who do you let in first?
The dog , of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut , and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning , God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then , neither God nor Man has rested.

 

Baseballmom- I'm sorry that I can't agree with your post. One of them is not accurate...........................................................................................



























and I ain't sayin' which one

 

Hey Braves, remember this thread?

 

Oh my gosh... here go the lies again!!!:smiley-linie-020:

 

I was thinking the same thing.

 

haha, can't believe a word from a guy that can't set a mouse trap.

 

I went fishing last week with my son. Took 1 anda half days off from work and went fly fishing up near Boone. We caught 26 trout and released them all safely. It was a great 2 days. No talking AAU, showcase, sports or any of that. It was a great 2 days with me son.

The tug is a drug. We had a blast.

 

Braves Remeber to measure using a yard stick not a meter stick.

 

I want to address this with my new adventure. My attorney, Haskell Willingham, a renown fisherman, decided to become a deer-hunting guide. Now Haskell was just entering the guide business and wanted me to be his first customer. I should have known something was “not right” when Haskell picked me up for the hunt in a cab.

“ Haskell, what in the world were you thinking? A cab? How are we going to hunt in a cab?”

“ Now Braves, take it easy. We’re not going in a cab” Whew, I thought. That didn’t look good.

“ We’re going in your truck…now pay the cab”

..and off we went in MY truck.

It is important for me to tell you that I have never been hunting in my life. I never understood why people seemed to like it. How hard is it to go in the woods and find a deer? Geez…its just some dumb animal. No way it would have a chance against my superior tracking skills. But I figured I’d get a few of them in an hour or so and spend the rest of the day laughing at Haskell. Did I tell you that Haskell has never hunted in his life either?

Anyway, Haskell had heard that the best way to hunt for deer was to sit in a tree, so that’s what we did for an hour, then another hour, then another hour. Finally we heard some crackling in the brush and we both raised our heads. We knew we finally found our deer. We raised our pistols and sighted our scopes…and WOW!! I was speechless. It was a group of hunters laughing, pointing and giggling at us. They strode through our camp and took pictures as they were leaving.

After spending 8 hours in a tree, I was tired and ready to go home. I didn’t like hunting and now I knew why. It ain’t fun! I can drive down my road and see 6-8 deer’s in my neighborhood every day…but nooooo. I go hunting for them in their neighborhood and they are nowhere to be found. I told Haskell:

“ Let’s go. I’m tired of this. I will never go hunting again, so don’t ever ask me ”

“Yeah Braves, you may be right. I think I’m going to retire from being a deer-hunting guide and go into something else”

I was worried about what Haskell may get into next, so I figured I better ask.

“I don’t know about that Haskell. I think the “Deer Preservation Society” probably love you as a guide”

“Nope…I know what I’m going to do. I’m going to be a baseball instructor." I didn't want to bring up the fact that he never played baseball in his life. Those type things don't deter him.

"Oh, and Braves, pay that cab driver that’s coming up the hill? I gotta hurry up and get started”

After a couple of weeks I received an email from one of those hunters that came through our camp. This sealed it. I will never go hunting again.